David J Paul Project Management Professional, Management Professor, Author and Small Business Manager
It’s really important to understand the terms Respect, Regard, and Reward. Together they constitute Caring. They are similar but the differences mean the world when it comes to motivation and engagement. My Chinese students have been such blessings to me, largely due to their elemental respect. We will discuss Regard and Reward in the next posts.
Respect
In China, in addition to elders and parents, teachers are also shown special respect. According to the Confucian code of social conduct, Wu Lun, “Five Cardinal Relationships,” “Proper respect is to be given to teachers whose wisdom and knowledge are taken for granted and not questioned…Individuals are expected to respect the teacher’s authority without preconditions” (Wan, 2001, p. 28). Due to their extensive knowledge and intelligence, teachers are perceived to be an intellectual role model who will show individuals the way of being human, teach them knowledge, and enlighten them when they are confused. For this reason, teachers are also widely regarded by their students as parents who would look after them with care and love. There is even a Chinese saying: “If someone taught you as a teacher for one day, you should respect him as your father for the rest of your life” (Wan, 2001, p. 29 ).
Respect is a basic moral principle and a human right that derives from the values of human dignity, worthiness, uniqueness of persons, and self-determination. As a guiding principle for actions toward others, respect is conveyed through the unconditional acceptance, recognition, and acknowledgement of the above values in all persons.
Research in the area of respect is conducted by philosophers. Respect can be a mystifying phenomenon because it comprises a subjective component—an attitude—and two objective components—conduct, and its object. Respect can also be confusing because these three components can be at odds. Therefore, when it is not congruent with its object or the attitude or the conduct, respect is compromised. Qualified respect is compromised respect (Myers, 1989). “Without feelings of respect or a respectful attitude, respectful behavior is insincere, if not calculating or hypocritical” (Myers, 1989, p. 225). Respect has the notion of the ‘other person’ but it also has an element of self-respect.
Telfer (1968, p. 18) writes that “Self respect is independence, tenacity, and self-control”, and he writes from the point of view of a philosopher. From the early writings of Aristotle, the notion of self-respect seems to acquire a measure of “profound moral importance” (Dillon, 1995, p. 224). “Hobbes, Hume, Hegel, Kant, and Nietzche all have something to say about the importance of self-respect in moral philosophy” (Dillon, 1995, p. 224). Moral philosophy, moreover links the notion of self-respect to respect and regard, to esteem and to the notion of worth. Immanuel Kant maintained (Myers, 1989, p. 225) that “all persons deserve and ought to maintain” self-respect. Kant’s edict to “act in such a way that you always treat humanity, whether in your own person or in the person of any other, never simply as a means, but always at the same time as an end” (Hill, 1999, p. 18)—is widely regarded as the preeminent statement of the principle of respect for persons, the simple but powerful idea that all persons must be respected as persons.
Dillon’s book on self respect explains the connection between self-respect and worth. When we strive to be morally worthy out of reverence and love of honor—when we aim to honor the dignity in our own person—we feel proper self-respect, that lets us know where we stand morally and keeps us headed in the right direction. “To have a sense of worth is not simply to recognize that one has worth, but to regard that fact as mattering a great deal.” (Dillon, 1995, p. 20 ) Others write that “Self respect is a standing favorable attitude toward oneself predicated on a sense of one’s own worth as a person…….Thus, self respect is stable” and, as such, is related directly to worth. (Myers, 1989, p. 226)
When this concept of self respect and worth translates to the workplace, the Stanford University Plato Project (2009) reports, “We may learn that jobs and relationships become unbearable if we receive no respect in them; in certain social milieus we may learn the price of disrespect if we violate the street law: ‘Diss me, and you die’….. Despite the widespread acknowledgement of the importance of respect and self-respect in moral and political life and theory, there is no settled agreement in either everyday thinking or philosophical discussion about such issues as how to understand the concepts, what the appropriate objects of respect are, what is involved in respecting various objects, what the conditions are for self-respect, and what the scope is of any moral requirements regarding respect and self-respect” (Stanford, 2009, p. 36). There is even less agreement about the relationship of respect, self-respect, and self-worth and an order of magnitude less written about the concept of regard. My research clearly indicates the powerful differences between Respect, Regard, and Reward.
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